It's Easy to Say Anything

What is prayer but talking to God? But do you admit that sometimes it is easier to talk about talking with God than it is to actually talk to him? It is easier to tell others to talk with God than to talk with him ourselves? How easy it is to be a hypocrite.

Do you not know that in a race all the runners complete, but only one receives the prize? So run that you may obtain it. Every athlete exercises self-control in all things. They do it to receive a perishable wreath, but we an imperishable. Well, I do not run aimlessly, I do not box as one beating the air; but I pommel my body and subdue it, lest after preaching to others I myself should be disqualified. 1 Corinthians 9:24-27 Revised Standard Version

Preaching to others but failing to practice what one preaches. I suppose at times we are all guilty of it. And in today's modern world of fast communication it becomes nigh impossible for public figures to hide any of their hypocrisy. I confess mine, sometimes, because I need the reminders of my imperfections. I need the reminder that I am not a lesbian, so that when I speak (write) with my lesbian friends I am aware that seemingly nothing phrases to me may stir feelings of condescension, resentment, abandonment, judgment, or something else. The same is true when I speak with any woman, or Muslims, or Jews, or some other group to which I have not ever belonged.

I struggle with myself. Where I am in my life, and what I am before God. Where am I going, and why? Who am I really? Why is it that I, a man, should find myself so identifying with women who call themselves lesbians? Why do I ache more for their heartaches, their rejections, their obstacles, than those of others who are "more like me"? I don't understand it, but my caring is real. They are real.

And no two are the same. I think that can be the beautify of meeting new people, be they lesbian, Christian, Mormon, Muslim, Athiest, black, white, Australian, Egyptian, Iranian, or whatever. There are so many things which are common to all of us. We share a lot of the same fears and hurts, no matter where in this world we live, or what we look like, or how we make our way. And yet despite all of this commonality, no two of us are the same. When you think of all of the billions of people on this plant that's quite impressive. Far more than the snowflake theory. Even the hairs on our heads are numbered.

I don't read my Bible everyday. Sometimes I forget. Sometimes I forget and then remember later, but still choose not to read it. Sometimes I do. Did read it this morning. Read in Luke about "rendering to Caesar the things that are Caesar, and to God the things that are God's". Read about hypocrisy, too. Christ made frequent warnings about hypocrisy. Probably because it is so easy to fall into. It's almost like walking down an old country road. You really can't do it without getting dust on your feet.

When I was young and first walking life as a Christian I marved at the Apostle Paul. He he such a wonderful relationship with God. He knew so many things. But in growing older I think I have learned something about "praying without ceasing". What it means.

There is formal prayer, often done on the knees or in some other position demonstrating humility before God's majesty. Then there is desperate prayer, when time is of the essence and the heart is crying out for help. There is casual prayer, when the conversation with God is about everyday things. And then there is communal prayer. This is difficult to describe, but sometimes I feel it is what I have with God. It's just the awareness that he is there. There is no need to bow in reverence, or cry out for deliverance, or request this or that, or even talk at all. Just an awareness that he is there. Sometimes I don't talk to my spouse or son, but am comforted by the fact I know they are here. And when they speak to me I hear right off. (Usually.) I think that's praying without ceasing. Keeping God conscious in our thoughts.

Perhaps if we were to all work on doing that we would be less concerned with criticizing women who wish to marry a woman, or hating someone for raising taxes, cutting benefits, or calling God by a name we do not use. Perhaps, if we were to keep God's presence in our lives, we would find ourselves loving more people than we have ever loved before. We might not understand why we love these people, but we would most definitely be happier for it.

There are so many wonderful people to get to know. It's going to take an eternity just to make our introductions.

Where are You Beautiful

I subscribe on YouTube to the communitychannel. That's where I watch videos posted by a young woman named Natalie from Australia. What I like about her films is the way she takes everyday things and expands them to show us how funny we all are.

This particular video is about another group of people who deserve to have someone look out for them. I happen to belong to this group. "Ugly" people.



She did this to be funny, but I kind of think she was also making a point. She has two comments which I find so revealing about our societies:

"There's something really surprising about someone ugly being able to do anything."

"You sound like an attractive person."

Isn't that often how we tend to look at people? "Attractive" people get listened to. They get promotions. They get all kinds of things "ugly" people don't get. And yet, are they attractive?

Some are. Incredibly, there are many people who have the physical attributes to qualify them as "attractive" and are still attractive people. By that I mean nice. Loving. Caring. Too often, though, they tend to be a bit arrogant.

I recently told someone that one of the sexiest women I ever met was over one hundred pounds overweight. But she was such a dear. She would go out of her way to help even people she didn't like. She was sensitive, caring, and totally loving. And yet people made fun of her because of her weight. More than once I had to close our office door while she cried because some insensitive clod had made fun of her appearance. Personally, I found her to be quite sexy.

The other day while driving to an appointment with my heart doctor I was listening to the radio. The DJs were interviewing a woman who specialized in relationship training for lesbians. After the interview concluded the male DJs began making fun of the women who availed themselves of the new law in Iowa which allows them to marry women. They made several snide remarks about how "ugly" the women were. I very much doubt the women found each other "ugly" at all.

And do you know something else? I'm finding that I look less at the "shell" people are wearing when I first meet them now. So many people are so beautiful inside a shell which dares us to look for them. My shell is not exactly something people fall over to look at, so I suppose it's only natural that I take this attitude. But I think we need to start seeing people as God sees them, and not as humans do. The eyes of our body don't see nearly so well as the Spirit of God. Let's let Him guide our vision. Okay?

Where are you beautiful? Outside but not inside? Inside by not outside? Both? Neither? If you're not pretty on the inside, go talk to God. He can - and will - change that for you.

Well-Meaning, But Still Wrong

A couple of days ago I wrote that several of my on-line friends are lesbian, or bi-sexual. I suppose I must have been feeling a bit self-exalted for "being so compassionate". What a sickening thing for me to write, but I bet that's how I came across. And I was put in my place not long after. And it served me right.

Thinking to write something wonderful, understanding, and totally wise to one of my lesbian friends I instead wrote something, awful, insensitive, and completely stupid. She was kind enough to let me know without expressing her true indignation over my complete lack of understanding.

I felt like crying. I really did. It just brings home how difficult it is to completely understand someone's pain when you don't base your understanding on a close enough pain. If you've never suffered the death of someone you love dearly it is difficult for you to wholly empathize with someone who has. You can draw upon the loneliness and hurt about being rejected, or some other hurt, but it isn't the same as losing someone you love.

I have never had anyone pass a law stating I cannot marry someone I love. No one is trying to pass such a law. Now.

There are laws, in 46 of our 50 states, which state lesbians cannot marry the women they love. In California, the law was changed so they can. Now there is a strong movement to get the law changed back, nullifying the marriages which have already taken place. Real people, some of them my friends, are having to deal with this. Their stomachs are knotted with fear. How awful to know that there are people who are seeking to make your marriage illegal. It's happening.

What shames me is that the gay, lesbian, bi-sexual, transgender community is not really mistaken about how they perceive the Christian community. The Christian community has become so exclusive it's like some horrible country club where only the very rich can be members. It certainly isn't the rich who are joining this club. The very stupid. The very very stupid. I am ashamed to be part of it.

Why? Because these "conservatives" stick up for the Bible?

No. Because they don't stick up for the Bible, but they have convinced themselves and most everyone else they do. People who spout hatred for others, and make no mistake, these people hate the gay, lesbian, bi-sexual, transgender community, don't know anything about God. I'm not even sure they all believe he exists.

Listen to what the Apostle John wrote. John was the Beloved Apostle. The only one God spared from martyrdom.

First John (chapter two) New King James Version

[3] Now by this we know that we know Him, if we keep His commandments.

[4] He who says, "I know Him," and does not keep His commandments, is a liar, and the truth is not in him.

[5] But whoever keeps His word, truly the love of God is perfected in him. By this we know that we are in Him.

[6] He who says he abides in Him ought himself also to walk just as He walked.

[7] Brethren, I write no new commandment to you, but an old commandment which you have had from the beginning. The old commandment is the word which you heard from the beginning.

[8] Again, a new commandment I write to you, which thing is true in Him and in you, because the darkness is passing away, and the true light is already shining.

[9] He who says he is in the light, and hates his brother, is in darkness until now.

[10] He who loves his brother abides in the light, and there is no cause for stumbling in him.

[11] But he who hates his brother is in darkness and walks in darkness, and does not know where he is going, because the darkness has blinded his eyes.

And who are our brothers? Read the story of the Good Samaritan.

I wish I understood my friends' pains and fears. If it were possible, I should become a lesbian in order to understand. Then I wouldn't speak foolishness and insensitivity when I only wish to encourage and uplift.

Confessions of a Reformed Hypocrite

I wonder about myself. A lot. There is no doubt in my mind and heart that should most Christians see my life as it really is, in my home, every day, my thoughts and such, they would probably wonder if I even am a Christian.

Well, if being a Christian means thinking thoughts they say I should think, and doing things they say I should do, and not doing things they say I should avoid, then I'm not. Used to be. Kind of.

When I existed in my cloister of like-minded creatures it was easy to see everything and know everything. But I slipped and fell, and in so doing left that cloister and found myself in the real world, where real people live with real problems. People have real feelings. Their hurts are no less real than my own, and often are more so.

One of my very dearest friends (whom I have never met) was hurt recently. It's been a long time (to me) since I've heard from her. I'm fearing now that I will never hear from her again. That is such a lonely feeling, despite the fact I have other friends. It brings home the parable of the lost sheep and coin.

Matthew (chapter eighteen) New King James Version

[12] What do you think? If a man has a hundred sheep, and one of them goes astray, does he not leave the ninety-nine and go to the mountains to seek the one that is straying?

[13] And if he should find it, assuredly, I say to you, he rejoices more over that sheep than over the ninety-nine that did not go astray.

My friend has not "gone astray". She's just gone. From me. But I have no doubt she continues to live an honorable and happy life with her family, as she did before. I just miss her.

These are the kinds of things I became exposed to when I left my cloister. I fell in love with people I used to think I should not fall in love with. I'm not talking about sex. I'm talking about love. Loving someone from the heart and not wishing to possess them. Only seeking their happiness and good will. I've met so many people like that. Most are women, yes. But that's just because I relate better to women. But there are men within my circle of influence.

Several of my friends happen to be lesbian, or bi-sexual. This, I know, would cause great consternation from my old cloister friends, who do not seek me out, by the way. Not since I fell. I suppose they always had their doubts about me anyway. I wonder about me, too.

But I can't bring myself to criticize gay people anymore. I've met too many now to return to what was. No longer do I view them as "those people", and talk about them as though they were characters from a novel and therefore had no feelings or spirits to concern. Now they're my people, because I call them friends. I don't know them well, but I know them. And when they cry because people stand in hatred against them and say they can't be married to the person they love, I find myself crying with them. I find myself wishing I were a lesbian so I could stand with them, arm in arm, and cry together that there is nothing wrong with love! I see their love for each other and I am ashamed of things I said a long time ago.

How can I, having spoken against real people, claim to be in God's blessing? I read from Luke this morning. It was the passage about the Pharisee and the publican. I read it and find myself wondering which man I really am.

Luke (chapter 18) Revised Standard Version

[9] He also told this parable to some who trusted in themselves that they were righteous and despised others:

[10] "Two men went up into the temple to pray, one a Pharisee and the other a tax collector.

[11] The Pharisee stood and prayed thus with himself, 'God, I thank thee that I am not like other men, extortioners, unjust, adulterers, or even like this tax collector.

[12] I fast twice a week, I give tithes of all that I get.'

[13] But the tax collector, standing far off, would not even lift up his eyes to heaven, but beat his breast, saying, 'God, be merciful to me a sinner!'

[14] I tell you, this man went down to his house justified rather than the other, for every one who exalts himself will be humbled, but he who humbles himself will be exalted."

I know which man I should be, but am I really that man? Or am I deluding myself with false humility?

What I have found in going on-line and meeting all of these people, is that I care about them. I get to know them and they matter to me. And the more people matter to me the less I find I can speak judgment over things they might be doing. For one thing, I am seeing my life as far worse than anything I can accuse others of. And I don't want to accuse others of anything. Not anymore. They're my friends now, and I love my friends. I want to make their lives better. Not by telling them what to do and not do and how to live their lives. But instead by just accepting them for who they are today, and not worry about the rest. I just want to love them, and hope that that makes their lives better. At least a little.

And when I lose them, it hurts. It hurts so very bad. And it's lonely. Too many friends are silent. And one may be gone forever now.

"Eloi, Eloi, lama sabachthani?" Mark 15:34 (a portion) Revised Standard Version

The words of Jesus when he was rejected by God.

It's not too unlike that to lose a friend. The Cloister will call that blasphemy.

Failing Voice

Not doing even a mediocre job of being a consistent and sound voice in the cause of women's rights, gay rights, faith rights, or any other rights for that matter.

Pity.

I guess my problem is that instead of focusing on the problem spoken of in the news, I look at how things are operating in my country and see the same thing on our horizon. My suspicion is that similar activities are going on here that get reported from other countries.

Christianity is my "religion", but I don't adhere to it so much. For me, my life has become more about faith than religion. It has changed since 1975, when I gave my life to God - to Jesus. Or maybe I have changed. Or maybe I have just become more aware. Or maybe some of everything.

Back in 1975 I began my Christian walk by attending a Baptist church in a northern suburb of Minneapolis. It was far enough away that we in that community were not considered "city people". But to relatives up north we were.

The church was a small one, with an official congregation of less than 250, but seldom were there ever more than 150 there. In summer it could drop as low as 50.

The pastor was a wise man, if not a great preacher. But he preached the Truth. He preached God, God's love, and God's forgiveness. Although a conservative group (we were aligned with the Southern Baptists), I don't recall any preaching against anyone. Sin was sin, and it was condemned, but I don't recall Pastor M ever saying, publicly from the pulpit, or privately afterward, that any group of people was inferior, condemned, or any other derogatory word. He wasn't into that. Pastor M spoke of getting to know God and letting God change our lives.

I didn't notice the church cliques, but I expect they were there. That is just normal behavior for normal people. But I was young and enthusiastic. I got involved in a few things, but mostly I was afraid to do much. Although I wanted to do 'great things', I knew I was not qualified.

I guess I was in my own personal cloister, shut off from what the real world was like. Every day I hoped the end of the world would come so I could go to heaven. The idea of the horrible destruction spoke of in Revelation meant only that the end had come. The thought that real people would be suffering was outside my comprehension.

Fast forward to the present.

Preaching seems to have changed. We have two methods going, and I don't think either of them are any good at all.

On the one hand we have the Social Liberal Preachers, who don't seem to believe anything about God at all. Their god does not appear to be a real person, but rather a set of social ideas. The problem I see with this is there is no God behind it to fuel it with His Spirit.

But understand this, that in the last days there will come times of stress. For men will be lovers of self, lovers of money, proud, arrogant, abusive, disobedient to their parents, ungrateful, unholy, inhuman, implacable, slanderers, profligates, fierce, haters of good, treacherous, reckless, swollen with conceit, lovers of pleasure rather than lovers of God, holding the form of religion but denying the power of it. Avoid such people. 2 Timothy 3:1-5 Revised Standard Version

For the time is coming when people will not endure sound teaching, but having itching ears they will accumulate for themselves teachers to suit their own likings, and will turn away from listening to the truth and wander into myths. 2 Timothy 4:3-4 Revised Standard Version

The other kind of preaching is the Intolerant, Self-Righteous Kind. This is the "we versus them" thing. "We" are good. Blessed by God. "They" are sinners, going to hell.

Jesus spoke against this all through his ministry. Just yesterday I posted this from Luke, Chapter Eighteen:

[9] He also told this parable to some who trusted in themselves that they were righteous and despised others:

[10] "Two men went up into the temple to pray, one a Pharisee and the other a tax collector.

[11] The Pharisee stood and prayed thus with himself, 'God, I thank thee that I am not like other men, extortioners, unjust, adulterers, or even like this tax collector.

[12] I fast twice a week, I give tithes of all that I get.'

[13] But the tax collector, standing far off, would not even lift up his eyes to heaven, but beat his breast, saying, 'God, be merciful to me a sinner!'

[14] I tell you, this man went down to his house justified rather than the other; for every one who exalts himself will be humbled, but he who humbles himself will be exalted."

Of the two I guess I lean more toward the social side than the condemnation. That does not put me in good standing with conservative Christians. But I can't bring myself to say sin is not sin (although the conservatives argue that I do, in fact, say that by not speaking out against it), which does not put me in good standing with liberals.

I worry about myself. Am I a hypocrite? Have I 'left my first love'? To listen to some talk, the answer to both questions is 'Yes'. They may be right. I can't argue. For me, it's all about God's forgiveness. I am counting on the forgiveness given through Christ Jesus. I won't argue about other ways.

Right or wrong, my message is about as basic as it can be: God loves each of us because we are us. He accepts us as we are today - complete with our sins. He forgives us. He wants us to get to know him because he knows that in so doing, we will cease to sin - in time. (An important point the ultra conservatives fail to consider.)

While that stance seems to imply a lot of things a lot of people don't care to hear, I will only say this: Who am I to not accept someone God accepts? Who am I to criticize one person's love for another? Who am I to say they should be tore apart? Who am I to judge anyone? I don't want to be judged, so I dare not judge others.

I'm not going to waste my time, or others' time, by ranting about how they're doing this or that wrong, and that God isn't happy with them. Instead, I will tell them that God loves them, and despite what the ultra conservatives preach, God very much will accept them.

There is a song, played and sung at the end of Billy Graham rallies which expresses this:

Just as I am, without one plea
but that thy blood was shed for me
and that thou bidst me come to thee
O Lamb of God, I come, I come

That's my message, too. I realize this song is specifically referring to Jesus, but don't worry about that now. Don't say Jesus, then. Just say God, or whatever name you know him by. If you honestly search for him, you will find him. He wants to be found.

Ask, and it will be given you; seek, and you will find; knock, and it will be opened to you. For every one who asks receives, and he who seeks finds, and to him who knocks it will be opened. Matthew 7:7-8 Revised Standard Version

That's what it's talking about. Finding God.

We're Not Getting Better at All, Are We

There is an ugly tendency for people of faith and/or religion to view the misfortune of others as God's judgment upon them. This was done when Jesus walked the earth. This was his response.

Luke (chapter thirteen)

[1] There were some present at that very time who told him of the Galileans whose blood Pilate had mingled with their sacrifices.

[2] And he answered them, "Do you think that these Galileans were worse sinners than all the other Galileans, because they suffered thus?

[3] I tell you, No; but unless you repent you will all likewise perish.

[4] Or those eighteen upon whom the tower in Siloam fell and killed them, do you think that they were worse offenders than all the others who dwelt in Jerusalem?

[5] I tell you, No; but unless you repent you will all likewise perish."

[6] And he told them this parable: "A man had a fig tree planted in his vineyard; and he came seeking fruit on it and found none.

[7] And he said to the vinedresser, 'Lo, these three years I have come seeking fruit on this fig tree, and I find none. Cut it down; why should it use up the ground?'

[8] And he answered him, 'Let it alone, sir, this year also, till I dig about it and put on manure.

[9] And if it bears fruit next year, well adn good; but if not, you can cut it down.'"

We love to tell ourselves that "others" are offending God and that God is happy with us. Not likely at all.

Luke (chapter eighteen)

[9] He also told this parable to some who trusted in themselves that they were righteous and despised others:

[10] "Two men went up into the temple to pray, one a Pharisee and the other a tax collector.

[11] The Pharisee stood and prayed thus with himself, 'God, I thank thee that I am not like other men, extortioners, unjust, adulterers, or even like this tax collector.

[12] I fast twice a week, I give tithes of all that I get.'

[13] But the tax collector, standing far off, would not even lift up his eyes to heaven, but beat his breast, saying, 'God, be merciful to me a sinner!'

[14] I tell you, this man went down to his house justified rather than the other; for every one who exalts himself will be humbled, but he who humbles himself will be exalted."

Last evening, on the news, I learned about a new atrocity being committed against women. This time in Afghanistan. The new regime, put in place by the Bush Administration, has just signed into law an edict which basically makes women sex slaves of their husbands. They can't even leave the house without permission. And they say they are treating their women better because now their women don't have to worry about money. I'm not sure I follow the logic. Afghanistan women are in the streets protesting - risking their very lives in the doing.

I do not know what to do to help those women, except to say to the world that it's happening.

In times of great fear and change there are always those who will seek to put under foot others, who threaten to displace them as supreme. It happens in this country. That is why our country, while more free than most, has never been free for everyone. If it hasn't been women being subjugated, it has been Native Americans, African Americans, Irish Americans, Italian Americans, German Americans, Japanese Americans, Gay and Lesbian Americans, Bisexual and Transgender Americans, Old Americans, Poor Americans. There are others, and if I skipped a group you happen to belong to, I apologize.

I think the fear of losing power must only be superceded by the fear of losing life.

Also on the news was the evidence that America tortured prisoners during the Bush Administration. They claimed it wasn't torture. Then let them be subjected to the treatment. That's what I say. I think they would change their minds quite quickly.

We have a lot to answer for, we who think we're better than others. We don't steal corn, and so we claim ourselves honest, despite the fact we steal wheat. We are no better than the Taliban. We just use different methods. We don't torture and murder people in the streets. We do in the privacy of prisons and internment camps. We don't make laws prohibiting women from enjoying equal rights with men. We just ignore those laws which say we must give them equality. We don't say out loud that women should be sex slaves of men. Yet look at our advertising, movies, and television shows. Not everything we're accused of is a lie or misunderstanding. Some things they got very right.

We have to be on guard in the west. We have to defend the rights of those who are different from us. For if we don't, and they lose their rights, we're next in line. Don't you understand? We hang together or we hang separately. (Forget who said that, but it's as true today as ever.)

Sermon - 1001

I'm not doing a very good job at raising the awareness of women's issues. Maybe I'll improve. Maybe I should just call it day and let someone else do it. But isn't the "let someone else do it" thinking the kind of thinking which acts as a breeding ground for further abuses?

Found this website about Muslim Women. The site begins with the following:

The issue of women in Islam is highly controversial. Any materials on this subject, whether in print or online, should be used with caution because of the lack of objectivity.

So many (if not all) of the issues "Muslim" women have to deal with are the same issues "Christian" women have to deal with, and "Jewish", and any other identifier you care to pick.

"Christians don't have to wear burkas," you say. And perhaps you can rattle off a host of other things that pertain specifically to Islam and think Christianity and the other faiths are "off the hook". I disagree.

To me, it isn't the specific ways that control is administered that is the issue. It is the issue that control is being administered. And if you think Christianity and the other faiths don't attempt to control women then you are not thinking.

This has nothing to do with God, by the way. If you read God's word you will find none of what he tells us is specific to women or men, with the following exceptions:

To the woman he said, "I will greatly multiply your pain in childbearing; in pain you shall bring forth children, yet your desire shall be for your husband, and he shall rule over you." And to Adam he said, "Because you have listened to the voice of your wife, and have eaten of the tree of which I commanded you, 'You shall not eat of it', cursed is the ground because of you; in toil you shall eat of it all the days of your life; thorns and thistle it shall bring forth to you; and you shall eat the plants of the field. In the sweat of you face you shall eat bread till you return to the ground, for out of it you were taken; you are dust, and to dust you shall return." Genesis 3:16-19 Revised Standard Version

Now, before you get all up in arms, or think that someone the Bible condones women as slaves and property, let us continue. What else does God say? Remember, we must consider all he says before we go running off half-cocked. And while I won't post all God says, I will show there is balance.

(All bold hi-lighting is mine - to emphasize a point - and not in the Scripture itself.)

Be subject to one another out of reverence to Christ. Wives, be subject to your husbands, as to the Lord. For the husband is the head of the wife as Christ is the head of the church, his body, and is himself its Savior. As the church is subject to Christ, so let wives also be subject in everything to their husbands. Husbands, love your wives, as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her, that he might sanctify her, having cleansed her by the washing of water with the word, that he might present the church to himself in splendor, without spot or wrinkle or any such thing, that she might be holy and without blemish. Even so husbands hsould love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself. For no man ever hates his own flesh, but nourishes and cherishes it, as Christ does the church, because we are members of his body. "For this reason a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh." This mystery is a profound one, and I am saying that it refers to Christ and the church; however, let each one of you love his wife as himself, and let th wife see that she respects her husband. Ephesians 5:21-33 Revised Standard Version

I realize many people - women in particular - have come to hate these verses. But that's because so many idiots, fools, and control freaks have used them to purport something they do not say. For one thing, what does Jesus say about being "in charge"?

But Jesus called them to him and said, "You know that the rulers of the Gentiles lord it over them, and their great men exercise authority over them. It shall not be so among you; but whoever would be great among you must be your servant, and whoever would be first among you must be your slave; even as the Son of man came not to be served but to serve; and to give his life as a ransom for many." Matthew 20:25-28 Revised Standard Version

To be the "head of the household" is the SERVE the household, not boss it around. Not slap up the members because you are angry. Not to be angry all the time.

And they came to Capernaum; and when he was in the house he asked them, "What were you discussing on the way?" But they were silent; for on the way they had discussed with one another who was the greatest. And he sat down and called the twelves; and he said to them, "If any one would be first, he must be last of all and servant of all." And he took a child, and put him in the midst of them; and taking him in his arms, he said to them, "Whoever receives one such child in my name receives me; and whoever receives me, receives not me but him who sent me." Mark 9:33-37 Revised Standard Version

If you take in the whole Scripture you will quickly see the pattern. Those in charge are SERVANTS, not tyrants. Jesus came to SERVE the Church. Marriage refers to Christ and the Church. That means Husbands are to serve their Wives, not dominate them. Jesus did not boss his disciples around. Husbands are not to boss their wives around. Jesus did not slap his disciples because they acted outside his desire. Husbands are to do likewise.

Follow the example! Stop reading single verses of Scripture and using that to justify hateful and violent behavior. Don't you realize you have gone against God when you behave that way? There is only one reason to hit anyone, and that is as an act of protection - for oneself or for another who is under physical threat. Anger is no reason to hit anyone. That is a child's behavior, and we strive to teach it out of them, showing them better ways to handle frustration.

God has a special place in his heart for women. He has a special place in his heart for men. Don't go attacking the special places of God's heart.

Don Quixote at the Cyber Mill

So I'm giving my go at raising awareness/keeping awareness raised regarding the ill-treatment of women in the world. My go is hardly something to brag about as I'm doing it on a blog no one visits except me. But some day people will come. And when they do I want them to know where I stand on certain issues.

I happen to love women. Always have. Always will, I hope. Yes, and I can hear the taunts. "Oh, yes. You like women all right. [wink, wink]" Well, if that's the way you want to think of me than go right ahead. I really don't give a cr*p anymore. People think what they want to think. And that the problem! People think stupid things. And then they believe them. And then they act accordingly.

Jesus talked about this.

And he called the people to him and said to them "Hear and understand: not what goes into the mouth defiles a man, but what comes out of the mouth, this defiles a man." Then the disciples came and said to him, "Do you know that the Pharisees were offended when they heard this saying?" He answered, "Every plant which my heavenly Father has not planted will be rotted up. Let them alone; they are blind guides. And if a blind man leads a blind man, both will fall into a pit." But Peter said to him, "Explain the parable to us." And he said, "Are you also still without understanding? Do you not see that whatever goes into the mouth passes into the stomach, and so passes on? But what comes out of the mouth proceeds from the heart, and this defiles a man. For out of the heartcome evil toughts, murder, adultery, fornication, theft, false witness, slander. These are what defile a man; but to eat with unwashed hands doe snot defile a man." Matthew 15:10-20 Revised Standard Version

It's amazing - and frightening sometimes - to realize the insanity some people purport to be truth. People convince themselves of the most malicious lies. And what we do not realize when we cling to hateful beliefs is that we make ourselves tools in the evil purposes of others. In essence, we become accomplices.

I have believed some horrible things in the past. But with the belief was the nagging doubt about the truth of someone else's inferiority and/or my superiority. Getting older has been good to me in the sense that it has provided me with more data, and after analyzing this data I have changed my position 180-degrees on several issues.

That's the thing about data. We can take it in and use it help us maintain and adjust our position on pretty much anything. This is called, Evaluating our Beliefs Based on the Data.

We can also do the opposite. Look at data and see if it conforms to our beliefs, tossing it aside as worthless when it doesnt. This is called, Evaluating Data Based on our Beliefs.

So many Christians, Jews, and Muslims become violently terrified at the prospect of taking in new data. They're just terrified the data will somehow undermine their faith by proving the non-existence of God, or his lack of caring, or the mere randomness of existence.

Guess what, people? Data doesn't do any of that. Do people look at the data and declare God does not exist? God does not care? God is evil? Existence is random? Of course they do. But here this hear it good: they were pre-disposed to come to those conclusions.

How do I know? Because they thought to prove God's existence. Can't be done. And ALL faith-bearing people understand that innately. God set things up so we can only find him through faith. Did that right from the start. We know that data cannot be used to prove God, so why believe it can be used to disprove God? It can't.

Neither can it be used to prove the inferiority of women, other faiths, other skin colors, other anything. If you think otherwise then you are walking against God. God didn't make any two of us the same, but at the same time he made us all equal. I just bought a bag of Braeburn Apples, a bag of Clementine Oranges, and a bag of Seedless Green Grapes. Each individual pieces of fruit is different from all other pieces of fruit. This is true even within a fruit variety. No two apples look the same. Nor do the oranges or grapes.

Yet the grapes all taste pretty much the same. Some are more ripe than others. So with the oranges and apples. Some apples are more crisp, and some oranges reveal themselves better. Each piece is uniquely different.

But no piece of fruit is superior to the others! Not one! When I take fruit for a meal or snack, I am not concerned, for I like ALL of the fruit.

People are like that with God. We are all so different. Even within the same faith, gender, skin color, community, whatever, we are different.

But no human is superior to another! Not one! When God speaks with us he is not concerned about skin color, gender, community, or even our faith - except that it is in Him.

So why do so many hate women? I've met women who hate women. Why? Because we're stupid. We like to believe the lies which tell us we're better than someone else. Anyone else. And after we believe those lies we attack any data (or messenger of data) who dares challenge our belief.

Life would be so much better if so many more of us could just accept our lowly place. I think we could achieve much greater things then.

A friend of mine from long ago had this phrase on a posted in her bedroom. It was by the door so she could see it every time she left her room. Let me see if I can remember how it went. I do not recall the author.

God did not create woman from man's feet, to be trodden underfoot by man.

Neither did God create women from man's head, to be lifted high above him.

God created woman from man's rib, to stand at his side as an equal helpmate.

Woman completes man. She does not dominate him. She is not his slave.

Picking Up the Fallen Flag of Inspiration

Unfortunately, I am hardly the one to be doing this. I am neither a woman nor a confessor of the Muslim faith. I am an old, fat, Christian male.

But the flag has been set down for a time, leaving a gap in the voice for decency and equality regarding the treatment of women. Muslim women have become the standard-bearers for the cause, but the truth is it is a world-wide problem in all cultures no matter the religion involved and whether religion is involved.

A great and wonderful voice is silent today because of the energy spent keeping this cause aloud, alive, and above the horizon where it can be seen. I will endeavor to carry on the cause until she recovers and returns to wave the flag - much higher and with greater inspiration than I can ever hope to. I do this for you, J. And for the cause which is right.

To be honest, I'm not entirely sure how to go about this. I have hitherto been lazy, and I've allowed J to work the front lines and face the turmoil and find the articles and pass on the word. Like all followers, I am hardly worthy of the one I follow. So I did a quick search on Google: Women in Islam.

My goal was to try and tap into current events in the Islamic world as they relate to women. The first result was a website called, "Women in Islam". I copied it to my sidebar as a Website of Note. There were several links and I chose to begin with "Women's Rights in Islam". J has taught me that women typically have more rights in Islam (according to the pure interpretation of the Quran) than most anywhere else. But, as has happened in Judaism, Christianity, and who knows how many other places, certain men, for a variety of reasons, have hijacked interpretation and created the hardship which prevails in current understanding.

The first article I read was by Arzu Merali, titled, "They Hate Women, Don't They".

I like the article because it reinforces the truth that we in the west "just don't get it". We're premeditatedly stupid when it comes to other cultures, and blind as bats when it comes to our own.

A couple of excerpts from Ms. Merali's article:

While the gap between Muslims and the west is widening the most striking feature of each other's critiques of their treatment of women is the lack of dissimilarity. Violence, workplace discrimination, educational opportunity and a desire for basic respect from men are universal issues.

Whether we are western, Muslim, both or neither, we must wake up to the possibility that what we see as problematic for women is much the same whoever and wherever we are. Plastered over billboards, or banished from view, women are subjugated by patriarchy. Demeaning Islam excludes the voices of Islamic women and that liberates no one.

We in the west need to wake up to our own treatment of women.

Our own Christian faith agrees with Ms. Merali's assessment.

"Judge not, that you be not judged. For with what judgment you judge, you will be judged; and with the measure you use, it will be measured back to you. And why do you look at the speck in your brother's eye, but do not consider the plank in your own eye? Or how can you say to your brother, 'Let me remove the speck from your eye'; and look, a plank is in your own eye? Hyprocrite! First remove the plank from your own eye, and then you will see clearly to remove the speck from your brother's eye." Matthew 7:1-5 New King James Version